Marist “CALLBOX” still running on iOS 1

call boxMarist students take caution. The days of walking safely from Fontaine to the dining hall are over. Our campus is no longer safe.

Since our first walks on the Marist College campus, students have been protected by a bubble of conspicuous ‘CALLBOX(es)’, which have warded off gangs of orphan pickpockets and sticky bandits. But sadly, these days are over.

Widespread cellphone ownership by students has drastically reduced the usage of campus call boxes to the point where the only activations occur by underclassmen lost in the middle-west area of campus or when Shelly gets hammered outside Sheahan on Fridays.

Now, decreased usage has led to widespread neglect.

You may not consider this an issue because these devices should still function if you need them, right? Wrong. This is what Marist Security wants you to think. The truth is, these call boxes are antiquated and archaic. Marist Information Technology (IT) has repeatedly failed to update the software of the several call boxes. Our call boxes are still running Apple iOS1. No one has a clue how to use that shit anymore.

Campuses nationwide have overwhelmingly updated call box software to iOS6. Marist cannot match half of that. I implore you to remember a time when your iPod Touch didn’t have a camera, when your calendar couldn’t sync with Google, or when you couldn’t ask Siri why she was being such a bitch.

Those were dark times.

Most people don’t care that our call boxes are second rate and third world. No one thinks they’ll ever have to use one. But when the time comes and you’re being followed by the Artful Dodger and Marve you’re gonna wish you had Siri for protection.

Call your Marist administrator. We need to update our security.